School is far less important to our kids future than we think. It is the work we do - or not - before our kids go to school that sets them up for life.
What we do BEFORE they go to school will make all the difference.
This chart - from the research of Hart and Risley - Shows how the learning gap widens over time from the first day of Kindergarten. The children go to the same schools. But by 13, the once tiny gap is very large.
This is because the "Trajectory" has been set before they go to school. The real work of preparing our children to lear and for life happens NOT at school, but at home and is largely done by 6. In fact, as we will see, it is largely done by 3.
We will explore this in later posts. But the main points of the task for all of us as parents are these:
It's all about environment. The space that we set in the family for our children. The more aligned to the child's development and health, the better.
- The family culture - Respect
- The diet
- Birth and Breast feeding
- Words and Tone
- Rules Structure and Autonomy
- Allo parenting - how much support from others who are close
The modern workplace compromises the environment like no other negative force. The modern work place is a massive barrier to doing this task well as it drains our energy and separates us as couples and as parents. The issue that the job creates is time and energy. We have neither if we both have a job.
The irony is that more and more young people of parenting age do not have traditional jobs. In my first book You Don't Need a Job - I explore the why's and the hows of this. Not having a job does not mean that you have to be poor, it means that you have control over your time and it means that you are not separated from your partner, home or child.
Over the next few weeks I will explore all of this as I use these posts to create the notes for Book 4 - You Don't Need a Scool to get and Education