He is coming. Getting old, helpless and dying is what lies ahead of me. As it does for all my age.
I am 62 tomorrow. My dad died aged 55. I may live for 20 + years or I could die tonight. One thing is for sure, the Grim Reaper and I have a date. I accept this. Do you?
My mum has been in a seniors home for 15 years and has been looked after by my sister and I for 31 years. She has not been able to look after herself since her late 40's. She has enjoyed the benefit of a great pension from my late dad. But I have no pension. Do you? If you do have a pension do you think that it will never change? Look at the Greeks. Look at what the numbers for PEI government pensions. Can you hope that "they" will fund you being helpless?
This recent article in the Guardian about End of Life and Palliative Care suggests that many people do not have any plan at all. Most people deny that they will get weaker and more helpless and nearly all deny the act of death itself.
Is this smart? Is this a loving thing to do when you have a family?
Here is my plan to reduce my chance of being physically and economically helpless.
The easiest way to become helpless is to continue to eat the modern diet. The average Islander Male is helpless by 65 and lives dependent on his family and on the state - you and me - for the next 9.7 years. I have radically changed my eating habits. I intend to be active until the end. This is something that all of us can do. When I was 59 I was on track to be that helpless man - so it is not too late guys.
But if you deny aging and death, you will not do this. When you deny this, you condemn your kids and the rest of society to look after you. Is this really what you want?
I have to find a way of being economically sustainable as well. Hence my selling our place here on PEI and looking for a Tiny House as our new home close to my kids. I will cut my running costs to the bone. Especially my exposure to energy and to food costs. The right sized home can also be designed to need very low maintenance.
Being close to our kids and extended family sets up a value exchange as well. We can do a lot to ease their burden of child rearing. Implicit with this is enough in the family "Bank" to make taking more care of us later, lawn mowing, help with housework etc more equitable.
As I see things, my parents generation could ignore all of this. The state and the system would take care of them as they aged. I don't see how this can work when the majority of people are old as they will be soon.
So do you have a plan? Do you accept that you are aging? Do you accept that you owe it to your kids and to the rest of us to do your best to take charge?
